Okay, so CFOs are "protecting the downside" in their 2026 budgets, according to some McKinsey & Company suit, Kevin Carmody. Yeah, no kidding. You don't need a McKinsey report to tell you that companies are scared shitless right now. It's like watching a bunch of toddlers trying to build a sandcastle during a hurricane.
Carmody says companies are still doing "static" budgets, even with all this fancy tech that gives you "instant data updates." He calls it a "valuable and important practice." Right. It's valuable because it gives them something to blame when everything goes sideways. These budgets are about as useful as a screen door on a submarine. According to CFO Dive, CFOs are reaching for downside budget protections, McKinsey exec says.
And the whole "rowing in the same direction" BS? Please. Let's be real, everyone's just trying to grab an oar before the ship sinks. McKinsey & company can spin it however they want.
Then there's the elephant in the room: AI. These geniuses are "budgeting for AI." As if anyone has a clue what that even means. It's like trying to budget for the weather. Sure, you can buy an umbrella, but good luck predicting when the tornado's gonna hit.
Upskilling workers? Another joke. They'll throw a few online courses at people and call it a day while secretly planning layoffs to replace them with algorithms that probably won't work half the time.
Carmody asks, "If you’re rolling out a product and you think the ramp curve has a slope…does it make sense to flatten that curve a little bit because you’re introducing new product?" What the hell does that even mean? It sounds like something generated by... well, maybe McKinsey AI.
And let's not forget the "geopolitical uncertainty." That's code for "we have no freaking idea what's going to happen next." Tariffs, trade wars, who knows what other global clusterfucks are brewing? Trying to forecast demand in this environment is like trying to predict the lottery numbers.
He says adding growth assumptions is the hardest part because you can't forecast with the geopolitical uncertainty. Offcourse you can't! You think these CFOs are Nostradamus?
But hey, at least estimating costs is easier, right? Because you have a "historic track record" for labor costs and SG&A. Except, that historic track record is about to be completely obliterated by inflation, supply chain disruptions, and whatever other economic disasters are lurking around the corner.
Then again, maybe I'm the crazy one here. Maybe these CFOs actually know what they're doing. Maybe they have some secret plan to navigate this mess. But I seriously doubt it.
McKinsey: What They Do and the AI Report
2025-11-21
